It's hard when we don't like some things and people are being an ass by not respecting our wishes.
As for me, when people do the things I don't like unintentionally, I could gladly forgive them. However, if people do them purposely to see how I would react, I didn't know what exactly to do, until this afternoon.
One of the things that I don't like is my waist area to be poked. I find that very irritating because when people did it, I would spontaneously scream hysterically. It is also actually trigger my anger, I think people have no right to touch any part of my body without my permission. I have mentioned it to those people who (I don't know why) like to poke my waist, so that they know I DON'T LIKE IT and hence, stop from doing it.
Sadly, some of them didn't understand what 'I DON'T LIKE' means. How many times already I said I don't like they doing it to me, yet they still took the liberty to 'poke' me every time they have the chance.
Today I lost my patient. There is this girl at work who thinks she's people's favourite. For whatever her reason was, she's the one who poked me the most in the past 12 months. She passed me on the way to the canteen. Instead of saying hello or good afternoon like normal people, she poked me on my waist AGAIN! She must have been expecting I would hysterically scream so she could laugh and poke me more. She was wrong this time, I don't put up with anybody who don't respect me and my wish anymore. Enough is enough. My first thought was slapping her on her face and said DON'T but lucky her, my palm was smarter than my brain this time. I didn't slap her on her face, it was on her hand. But too bad, my mouth did it's own thing, I don't know why I said MOTHER FUCKER, YOU PERVERT to her. Honestly, I didn't plan it. She was like...huh...with her mouth in O shape for a few second. Her face turned red, she turned around and hurried away. Well.
When I went back to the office, a few of her friends approached me and asked what happened. I told them I swore at her and I'm not sorry. They said I should consider saying sorry to her because she was in a very bad shape. When I heard 'bad shape', it worried me a bit. I was scared if I gave a bruise on her hand. So I went to her and there she was, crying. No bruise on her hand, just tears. So I said 'I'm sorry'... and added '...but there will be more of that in future if people keep disrespecting me and my wishes.' She stood up and shouted at me in tears, 'I was just kidding leh..why you slapped me very hard like that? Some more in front of people!'
Bastard! There when it really started. She 'poke' me in front of people every time she got the chance and she thinks it's funny? Did she think I enjoyed it when I screamed hysterically and people looked at me as if I was some sort of crazy woman? I slapped her hand and swore at her ONCE... and she cried like a baby? What the hell?
*Sigh* I didn't want to make it look very ugly, we both are adult. So I said to her, 'Look, I said I'm sorry to you. I have warned you many times before this. You are aware that I don't like being poked, it is very humiliating to me. You never say or feel sorry for what you have been doing to me continuously for 1 year now... so suck in, I'm not going to say anymore than I'm sorry for slapping you hard.' I walked away after that.
I heard her saying 'bitch'. I didn't look back at her or say anything. I just smiled. Bitch or not bitch, I have done what I have to do and said what I have to say. I don't regret doing that to her (though I'm sorry I slapped her quite hard) and that would be the first lesson for those people who think they could make fun of me easily.
By doing that and sharing it here don't mean I am sending out a message that I am a person who like to 'collect enemies'. No, I am not. I love peace and harmony. I like everybody to be my friend. I just wanted to share that I am capable to hold my patient for a long time but when I think it is too much already, I will stand up for myself. Yes, of course I am still angry at her now but knowing myself so well, I know I can't stay mad for long. Maybe tomorrow I would want to say 'more' sorry and make up with her. I am that kind of person nowadays. For now, I'll just enjoy the fact that I finally stood up for myself and my wishes.
As for me, when people do the things I don't like unintentionally, I could gladly forgive them. However, if people do them purposely to see how I would react, I didn't know what exactly to do, until this afternoon.
One of the things that I don't like is my waist area to be poked. I find that very irritating because when people did it, I would spontaneously scream hysterically. It is also actually trigger my anger, I think people have no right to touch any part of my body without my permission. I have mentioned it to those people who (I don't know why) like to poke my waist, so that they know I DON'T LIKE IT and hence, stop from doing it.
Sadly, some of them didn't understand what 'I DON'T LIKE' means. How many times already I said I don't like they doing it to me, yet they still took the liberty to 'poke' me every time they have the chance.
Today I lost my patient. There is this girl at work who thinks she's people's favourite. For whatever her reason was, she's the one who poked me the most in the past 12 months. She passed me on the way to the canteen. Instead of saying hello or good afternoon like normal people, she poked me on my waist AGAIN! She must have been expecting I would hysterically scream so she could laugh and poke me more. She was wrong this time, I don't put up with anybody who don't respect me and my wish anymore. Enough is enough. My first thought was slapping her on her face and said DON'T but lucky her, my palm was smarter than my brain this time. I didn't slap her on her face, it was on her hand. But too bad, my mouth did it's own thing, I don't know why I said MOTHER FUCKER, YOU PERVERT to her. Honestly, I didn't plan it. She was like...huh...with her mouth in O shape for a few second. Her face turned red, she turned around and hurried away. Well.
When I went back to the office, a few of her friends approached me and asked what happened. I told them I swore at her and I'm not sorry. They said I should consider saying sorry to her because she was in a very bad shape. When I heard 'bad shape', it worried me a bit. I was scared if I gave a bruise on her hand. So I went to her and there she was, crying. No bruise on her hand, just tears. So I said 'I'm sorry'... and added '...but there will be more of that in future if people keep disrespecting me and my wishes.' She stood up and shouted at me in tears, 'I was just kidding leh..why you slapped me very hard like that? Some more in front of people!'
Bastard! There when it really started. She 'poke' me in front of people every time she got the chance and she thinks it's funny? Did she think I enjoyed it when I screamed hysterically and people looked at me as if I was some sort of crazy woman? I slapped her hand and swore at her ONCE... and she cried like a baby? What the hell?
*Sigh* I didn't want to make it look very ugly, we both are adult. So I said to her, 'Look, I said I'm sorry to you. I have warned you many times before this. You are aware that I don't like being poked, it is very humiliating to me. You never say or feel sorry for what you have been doing to me continuously for 1 year now... so suck in, I'm not going to say anymore than I'm sorry for slapping you hard.' I walked away after that.
I heard her saying 'bitch'. I didn't look back at her or say anything. I just smiled. Bitch or not bitch, I have done what I have to do and said what I have to say. I don't regret doing that to her (though I'm sorry I slapped her quite hard) and that would be the first lesson for those people who think they could make fun of me easily.
By doing that and sharing it here don't mean I am sending out a message that I am a person who like to 'collect enemies'. No, I am not. I love peace and harmony. I like everybody to be my friend. I just wanted to share that I am capable to hold my patient for a long time but when I think it is too much already, I will stand up for myself. Yes, of course I am still angry at her now but knowing myself so well, I know I can't stay mad for long. Maybe tomorrow I would want to say 'more' sorry and make up with her. I am that kind of person nowadays. For now, I'll just enjoy the fact that I finally stood up for myself and my wishes.
2 comments:
Go bebeh! Standing up for myself has never been my thing. It's always for the sake of pleasing that I gave up on myself. However, I came to realize that I have to love myself first before I learn how to love others. The day I started respecting myself, was the very day people started hating me a lot! Be strong and know that I love you, always! >>HUGS<<
Thanks Aims. I notice some of my colleagues gave me dirty look today, specially those who are very close to that girl. I know what you mean by the day I started respecting myself, was the very day people started hating me a lot!
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